I would have loved to see the look on your face when you found out you were having twins. I doubt it could have been anything like mine. My doctor said I looked like I had just seen Big Foot. Here is why I was so shocked: my partner and I had been trying to get pregnant for a while and though in retrospect, it was quite short, it dragged on awfully for me.
Finding out that I’d be having not, one but two babies was a major shocker for me. From that moment to this, it has literally been a whirlwind of excitement; one moment after another. It seems like just yesterday that I was admiring their tiny little toes and today, they brush their own teeth!
During the course of this journey, I have learned some things that no one ever told me. I had no close friends with twins and so I had no idea what to expect. To make your journey less surprising, I have rounded up some of the most important things I’ve learned on my journey.
Table of Content
It is not double the work
Having twins is not double the work of having a single baby; it’s more. Double the work implies more hours. If you were spending five hours, you’d be spending 10 and double the energy. If that were the case, it wouldn’t be so bad. When it comes to having twins, it means doing double the work in the same time frame. You will do double of everything and you have the same hours that parents with single children have. You will spend more money, put in more effort, have less time, and constantly have to rack your brain for solutions to problems that you never knew could exist. It is definitely more than just ‘double’ the work. Try triple.
The right tools make all the difference
It may sound like I am exaggerating, but I’m not. With the right tools, your job gets a lot less stressful. With a weighted pacifier, you don’t need to worry about picking, washing, and returning the pacifier every five minutes that your babies let it fall. There are a lot of great tools that can improve your efficiency and give you a head start. One of my favorite and most helpful tools that I discovered were diaper bags for twins. I made the mistake of using normal diaper bags that simply came in large sizes. Don’t do that. Rather get a diaper bag fashioned to cater to the needs of two different kids with different properties.
Recommended: Best diaper backpack for mother of twins
They’ll have their bond
Long before I got pregnant or even got into a relationship, I found the relationships between twins cool. I knew some twins whom I grew up with and I was always jealous because they had obvious bonds. From outside twins look extremely connected but the fact is we don’t know the half of it. Before my twins started to talk, they would somehow help themselves to what they wanted to teamwork that was obviously planned. If they wanted to reach something, one would step on the other to achieve the aim. They communicated sometimes even without any sounds. At first, their escapades got me seriously bothered. I went crazy with baby proofing but that didn’t stop them. In the end, I just had to admit; they were way ahead of me. As a parent, the best you can do is babyproof and pray for the best. As a consolation, you know that they have each other’s backs.
You’ll automatically become a part-time referee
One might think that with a bond so strong, they would get on well. That is purely wishful thinking. One moment, they are as tight as thieves and the next, they act like they were sent to the earth as arch enemies. As a parent to twins, you will become a referee and that is non-debatable. They will fight so much that it will drive you nuts. I learned early not to interfere. Except they started to hit each other, I let them squabble then stepped in when they were ignoring each other, soothed them each and made them make up. Never try to solve their arguments. If you punish one twin no matter how much deserved it was, the other twin won’t forgive you. Even after I punished one twin due to a report from the other, the other still gave me the stink eye! If I put one twin in time out, the other would go join them. I learned to leave them be. They have a bond I’ll never understand and I have accepted it.
You will need to be firm
Twins are always mischievous. I learned quickly that each time I let something slide, they tried something else. The fact that they are two gives them more courage than a single child would have. You have to be firm or they will drive you over the edge. It takes a super-parent to handle a team as thick as thieves.
Each will be different
Despite the fact that they are so close, they will be so different. You will find how different they are shocking. They will act differently, talk differently, like different things, and have different temperaments. I think that because they are born together, we usually have unrealistic expectations of how similar they will be. Apart from sharing a womb, my twins have nothing in common. It is that diversity that gives them their own individuality. Appreciate it.
You’ll miss it
Soon after the twins are born. Your life will be transformed into a never-ending roller coaster. You will be so busy that before you catch your breath, they are all grown up. Here is something you do not know- you will miss it. Each time your baby grows up a bit and achieves something, you will be cast back to how tiny they used to be. It was hard watching my babies grow each day. One day they don’t want to leave you and the next they want to pour their milk themselves. I appreciate every little moment. It goes by too soon.
R:F – Loves traveling, nature and everything music. This is my journal, where I talk about the things I love and have experienced personally. I hope you enjoy my posts.